I’m a runner.

This time last week I’d have been unqualified to say that.  You could have probably had me pulled over by the running ombudsman and challenged that my occasional run/walk around country lanes signified nothing more than attempted running.

But this weekend I crossed a line, well two lines really – a start and a finish, although technically they were in the same place.  Taking part in the Buckingham 10km ‘fun’ run (insert suitable sarcastic put down) has gifted me the clout to call myself a runner.  I have a medal and a certificate and everything.

I can’t say it was easy, or fun, or actually in the least bit enjoyable.  Thanks to a scuppered ‘training plan’ the furthest I’d ever run prior to this was 4.2 miles and within 500 metres of the start line I realised that I’d made a terrible mistake and let my running buddies peel off into the distance. Know your limits, that’s my (running) motto; there was no point in trying to match anyone stride for stride so I settled into a very comfortable position otherwise known as ‘the back’.

I ran. It was slow but it was still a run, and clawed my way to 3km where the terrain changed and I could very easily have got away with claiming to have gone over on my ankle and needed to walk it out.  Somehow I carried on, reminding myself that in fact I hadn’t really run very far yet.  By 5km I was cursing everyone who’d ever encouraged me to run, whilst mentally kicking myself for not taking note of my own motto – 5km is an exceptionally respectable distance to run, I should have stuck to it.

I hit my ‘wall’ between 5 and 6km. You long distance runners may mock, but had it not been open countryside I’d have been very tempted to dive behind a hedge at this point and die a slightly knackered death.  As it was I ‘allowed’ lots of people to pass me as I gripped my thigh in a manner that suggested I might have suffered an injury – I’ve seen them do this at the Olympics, and on the football pitch…it’s a highly effective method of garnering sympathy and catching your breath.  It worked, very soon I was even further back than I had been previously and able to move again.

Out of nowhere came the banner for 7km, I was euphoric, or oxygen starved, either way I had a moment of hope where I began to believe I might make it.  This died as the road-that-went-on-for-ever stretched ahead of me and the realisation hit that the fastest finishers would probably be home by now enjoying bacon sandwiches and hot showers.  I looked out hopefully for 8km but it never came, just my endless gasps for breath punctuated by my running mantra…it went a bit like Hi-ee-yoooo….don’t ask me why, but it kept me going.

And then – 9km! 9km!!!! I laughed, I probably cheered a little – 9km! I WAS going to make it, there was no doubt – just this killer hill to get up and over then a smooth cruise back into the town, followed by another (WHAT?!) hill to the finish line.  But hello adrenaline and endorphins! The last 500metres felt brilliant, I picked up speed, relaxed, channelled every ‘proper’ runner I’ve ever known and lolloped over the finish line one hour, four minutes and 30-something-seconds after I’d started. I’ll take that thanks very much.

You’d think I’d know better than to do it again. So why, when this woman suggested we do the Bicester 10km on December 13th did I say “Oh go on then!” ???

And, for the record? Women do sweat….

Horses sweat, men perspire, women merely glow…
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18 thoughts on “Horses sweat, men perspire, women merely glow…

  • October 21, 2010 at 5:18 am
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    A hill at 9km? They were certainly laughing at you behind your back.
    I run 5k, i RUN 5k. It’s a totally respectable distance for an amateur who likes wine.

    Well done you.

    M2Mx

  • October 21, 2010 at 6:27 am
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    *applauds noisily and enthusiastically* I am very proud of you 😀 (am I allowed to say that when it was all your own work and nothing whatsoever to do with me?)

  • October 21, 2010 at 7:50 am
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    Well done you! Perhaps I should join you at Bicester. I’ve signed up for the MoonWalk which is 26 of the little buggers! I thought as it had walk in the title I’d be OK but you’ve seen walking in the Olympics haven’t you!!
    Brilliant that you did it AND finished. You glow in your success girl!

  • October 21, 2010 at 10:43 am
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    Am always in awe of anyone who does anything like this as it would be my absolute worst nightmare. Well done!! *standing ovation*

  • October 22, 2010 at 12:46 am
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    Well done you. I am so not built for running. I need to lose half a stone off my bust if I was going to do that. OH is running 10ks now but he’s running a marathon in March. In Barcelona. 😮

  • October 22, 2010 at 2:43 pm
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    Well done you, I walways used to say I wasnt built for running Kate, but after a mastectomy I can not longer use that excuse!

  • October 23, 2010 at 9:41 am
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    Lots of people were laughing at me to be fair….. i probably shouldn’t have been quite so melodramatic with my ‘injury’… and thank you xx

  • October 23, 2010 at 9:41 am
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    Yes, yes you are xx

  • October 23, 2010 at 9:42 am
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    Ha! Thanks, really should have taken a backpack full of Lucozade Sport with me. And yes, obviously had I not been ill I’d probably have finished in 45 mins 😉

  • October 23, 2010 at 9:43 am
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    The moonwalk is a brilliant thing to do – and not easy either. Well done you! I’m still glowing – and aching a little 😉

  • October 23, 2010 at 9:44 am
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    *curtsies awkwardly* It’s taking my thighs a little while to recover…. x

  • October 23, 2010 at 9:44 am
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    Thank yooooo! x

  • October 23, 2010 at 9:45 am
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    You could always strap them down Kate – there were plenty of well endowed women there….. not that I was looking! 😀

  • October 23, 2010 at 9:45 am
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    No excuse at all now Jen…does that mean it’s time to dust off the trainers? xx

  • November 8, 2010 at 1:54 pm
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    Well done Paula! I just about managed the 10km Cancer Research ‘run’ September just gone. It was bloody hard work, thank god for my SIL who almost dragged me round with a time of 1hr11. I was wheezing after only 1km so completely see where your coming from. Do you run regulary now? Xx

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