No, that’s not my new favourite expletive….(although it’s a good ‘un)
This was an eventful weekend: I spent Saturday morning in A&E with Middley after an abandoned radiator, stupidly left in the garden, fell on her foot. Actually, it would appear that the radiator mysteriously leapt out and jumped on her foot and, as no one else was present to witness the ABH, I can only take Middley’s word for it. Said radiator is now remanded in custody awaiting trial by municipal dump.
I should say that I love the NHS, they’ve taken good care of us over the years, saved my life before now and I wholeheartedly applaud everyone who works there. We are unbelievably lucky in the UK, a fact that was brought home to me when I read a sign saying that non- British Nationals would be charged for any A&E treatment they receive.
Anyway, in true Ronnie Corbett style, I’ve digressed. We checked in, saw the triage nurse and were taken through to wait for an x-ray. There we waited no more than 5 minutes before a lovely young man (how old do I sound?) came to receive us and take us through. He addressed Middley directly, and was so full of smiles and bounce that she had no time to be nervous.
In the radiography department he continued explaining everything he was doing and she was absolutely fine. I, on the other hand, was a giggling fool, thanks to the Kings Lynn Gonad Shields. It’s something that always sets me off – in my other life I often write about radiography equipment and digital imaging and visit hospital departments to construct case studies about how they do ‘their thing’. Every room is always equipped with a set of Gonad Shields and they are obviously vital for protecting internal organs from radiation.
My juvenile sense of humour always wonders who gets to make the choice about size: “Small, medium or large sir?” Surely the radiographic equivalent of condom purchasing?
Anyway, all sniggering aside, Middley was thankfully fracture free, bandaged up, rewarded with two stickers and we were sent on our way, leaving a poor young (possibly Russian, maybe E.European) girl sobbing in the waiting room – no doubt because of the size of her bill.